Thursday, November 16, 2017

Miracle Mornings

Have I mentioned that I don’t care for catchy titles that promise unlikely things? Well, I do dislike that, and so I had a negative reaction when a habit-forming support group suggested that we all try Miracle Mornings by Hal Elrod. I was like, Miracle Mornings? Really? But I read the overview and the items we’d be checking off of our lists every day, and it all sounded good.
One of the things on that list was keeping a journal about my progress and feelings. Here are my initial thoughts about S.A.V.E.R.S.:
Silence: I used to practice sitting (as in Zen meditational practice) waaaay back in college. I even went to a day-long retreat to advance my progress, where I learned walking meditation. Well. Today’s practice was hilarious. OMG, my chattering monkey! If I had even one moment of pure silence the monkey would instantly jump in with “you see? We’re not that much out of practice! That was great!” So I spent a lot of time feeling my way around in my head, remembering what I’d once had and gently shoving aside the monkey repeatedly. The method suggests at least one minute. I didn’t keep track. I hung out until I felt I’d made some progress. It was a lot more than a minute, though.
Affirmations: I didn’t have any affirmations yet, so I spent this morning’s affirmation time writing them down. They’re all over the place. I’ll streamline them over time. If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the years it’s that if you sit down to do something new and demand perfection of yourself from the first get-go, you’re probably going to be disappointed. It’s better to let go of perfection, especially if you don’t even know what perfection is supposed to look like, and come at a new task with an expectation that you’ll be learning. My weird-ass affirmations are actually a combo of affirmations and admonishments to do things that I know work.
  • I will listen to my genius (not my brain, it’s sort of a disembodied muse that gives me the good stuff from my subconscious and the world around me. My conscious, immediate mind is far, far from being a ‘genius’ as far as IQ and all that.)
  • I will remember that my writing will not be perfect in the draft, and so I’ll cast aside fears of bland writing and cliché to allow myself to tell the story.
  • I will give myself time to think about the story themes, forces of antagonism and character goals before I start writing for the day, instead of relying on what should obviously come next.
  • I will remember that relationships and character challenges and growth trump physical action in my work. Again, don’t be second-guessing and assume that because someone’s head isn’t being chopped off that the story is boring.
  • WONDER
  • I have fans (thank you!) and support (thanks!!)
  • I have already found success
  • I have resources and professional partners that assist me in writing, book production and marketing
  • I’ve already come a long way. There’s no reason why I can’t continue to learn and grow as a writer and artist.
Visualization: There’s no way I’m going to sit every day and visualize writing well. I don’t think I would get much value out of that. Instead, I have fitness goals that I’m going to visualize. First, I picture my ideal body at 165 pounds or so. Since I was at that weight within this decade, I know what I look like at that weight. I’m not going for my college athlete body, much less a young supermodel’s body. That never was and never will be me, nor do I really want that. So I have that image in my mind. The next step is visualizing the actions that will help me achieve that goal. So I pictured putting away temptations like the big bag of Cadbury chocolates my DH brought home from his trip to Europe. I can still have some if I want. I’m just not going to keep it on the counter where I can do a sugary drive-by every time I go into the kitchen. I also visualized going to the gym today, enjoying my music while my DH and I taunt each other and whine and laugh and generally have a good time. Which we always do. I also visualized going for a walk with my DH, and working out to a fitness DVD to emotionally prepare myself for the harder work to come.
Exercise: I already do ten (plus) pushups minimum every day, and stretching multiple times a day between writing binges. I decided that my morning exercise would be counted separately from that. So this morning, after a brief stretch (standing fold, and some dynamic stretches I do for belly dance) I did some pushups, jumping jacks, and skaters. The plan suggests starting with one minute of exercising. That was just right for me to start my day without feeling like I’m going to throw my schedule off to the point where I don’t get any real work started until after noon. To be honest, that happens way too much anyway as I get sucked into ‘fake’ work by surfing on Facebook and looking over emails that point to me as opposed to away from me. An example of an email that points to me is the Safeway ad, which (annoying) I have to click on and then click the deals so that they’re applied the next time I shop. An email that points away from me is an email from a client or friend that I need to respond to in order to do business and enjoy friendships. Makes sense?
Reading: I was really resistant to the idea of reading in the morning. I already read a huge amount every day, and I listen to a lot of informative podcasts. We subscribe to magazines like Time, Bon Apetít, and Fortune and it seems like I never have enough time to get to all the articles I want to read over the course of the day anyway (yes, I read them in the bathroom, don’t judge me!) But I did enjoy the luxury of putting in about fifteen minutes on the book I decided to read during my morning reading time: The Complete Renaissance Swordsman– A guide to the Use of All Manner of Weapons,  Antonio Manciolino’s Opera Nova (1531), translated and with a new illustrated introduction by Tom Leoni. You. Guys. It’s so awesome. I took a stab at reading this book a couple of years ago when I first acquired it, but something stopped me and I didn’t get back to it. Now that it’s a project, I know I’ll be able to finish it.
Scribing: That’s what I’m doing now. I’m writing my thoughts about my progress. Of the tasks, daily journaling is definitely the one I never, ever do. Let’s see if Miracle Mornings can once and for all get me into the blogging habit. I don’t intend to blog every single day (that would be horrible for all of you!) once I’m done with my thirty days of habit-forming, but I will by then, hopefully, be more regular. I’m a writer. There’s no excuse for six months between blog entries. After the thirty days I’ll do my daily journal stuff in an actual hand-written journal. This is here, now, to keep me honest for the thirty days. If I miss a day, you’ll know that I blew it on my Miracle Morning plan. One thing I can promise: my future posts on this won’t be nearly so long. Thanks for bearing with me so far.
I expect that there will be days that I mess up. But I actually have a pretty good track record of forming good habits. Not 100%. Absolutely not. But I’ve found that once I’ve decided that a habit matters to me, like daily writing of 2K for Nanowrimo (the rest of the year I schedule writing around client design projects) or making progress in the garden every day that it’s not pouring down rain (it’s been pouring down rain lately and I’ve been itching to get out!) I do actually do the thing I’ve decided to do. It’s deciding that it matters, and deciding what would be achievable to do on a daily or weekly basis, and then finally scheduling that task, that is the hard part.
It’s like figuring out what I want is harder than finding a way to get what I want. I think that’s true for a lot of people. Like the method itself says (or really repeats, because people have known this since ancient times; they’re just lousy at following their own advice) you have to set an achievable goal and then come up with the steps you need to take in order to achieve that goal. Once you have those steps down, it’s actually fairly easy to decide that hey, I’m going to brush my teeth, shower, get dressed and make myself presentable before 9am every work day. People with an external locus of control are driven to do this because their job ‘makes’ them. People with an internal locus of control decide to do this so they can not only keep their job through regular attendance, but because they want that job, or they want the paycheck, and they recognize that they can choose to look for other work if they’re miserable, learn to earn a living another way through training or arts and online selling or starting their own business or whatever. And of course they know they can’t just drop the job and chase their dreams. Again, they set the goal, figure out the steps, and start taking those steps. And in the meantime they’re getting up at 9am with a purpose. It’s their choice. They’re not being dragged through life. They’re living life.
I think it’s fascinating that outwardly the activities look the same, but the internal difference, the philosophy of it, determine whether or not you feel miserable and stuck, or motivated and happy despite the problems and inconveniences of things like work. Is it really this simple? Or am I some kind of outlier?
That’s a question for real philosophers, social scientists, psychologists, and economists. I’m just glad that it seems to work for me most of the time. I’m ready to do this. Anyone want to join me?